I was recently asked why I’m so into
the “partying thing” and I found myself scraping the surface of
what throwing a party means to me. I can’t recall how much I’ve
written on the topic of parties specifically, so given that it was
the focus of my house, is intimately tied to my conception of
reality, and is likely to mean a million different things to a
million different people, I think it’s perfect for my 300th
blog.
Partying to me is a perfect opportunity
for planned spontaneity. Left to its own devices, spontaneity could
arise as a car crash, or worse, something like stubbing your toe on
an AIDS needle under the corner of your hardwood armoire. In a party
setting, you set the conditions, but it’s up to the imagination and
will of the players to sort themselves out. Someone’s comment
sparks a waterfall of sarcasm and laughter. A beer pong champions
reign can be the height of anticipation and woe as the struggle to
dominate battles the odds and will. The smallest of victories; a
perfectly poured shot, a fire that didn’t catch something
important, the stripper move not landing you on your head, all can be
celebrated as if they in some small way are helping to cure cancer.
It’s a giant perspective shift, if
you let it. When you watch children, or retarded people, or animals
(don’t worry, none of them can read) playing the same movie over
and over or seeing yourself in the mirror or even wallowing in your
own filth is amazing. Until someone tells you about germs, and
being self-conscious, and other options do you get the sense that
what you once loved is no longer fulfilling or okay. Of course you
need more intellectual stimulation, and not to be covered in shit as
you grow up, and it’s not just grown-ups being mean and robbing you
of your childhood. That’s poverty’s job. But any time your
perspective shifts, something’s lost and something’s gained.
Well, as I’ve
harped about before, as you get older, and yes I’m talking about
you because I’m forever an overgrown man-child, your
perspective shifts. Maybe your body can’t eat or drink like it did
when you were a teenager. Maybe the idea of puking on your couch at 4
in the morning while your friends play Mario Kart on what’s
practically your dead body just doesn’t sound appealing. Here I
would argue that it’s not an either or. I’m still trying to get
all of my old friends to get freshmen around and let all the bad
stuff happen to them. My conception of party can comfortably fit
younger people’s embarrassing stories and awkward trying-to-hard
behaviors as part of my memories.
I like the idea of social lubricants. I
like the idea of a drunken mind speaking a sober heart. While I think
it’s less prevalent in my social circle to be behind a ton of walls,
I think the exact opposite about the world at large. I don’t want
to hear about how much you love your boyfriend, I want to hear, “I
loooove my boyfriend, but” and actually get somewhere. Tequila will
get you there; and your shirt on the floor, and your pants on the
stove. I think alcohol can be celebrated as a root of psychological
inquiry. Not to mention what it’s done for rape; because who wants
to remember that.
Every time I think of a party, I view it
as a celebration of the time I’m spending with friends. We get to
color in what it means to have reached the peak. You’ve got people
who care, understand you, are willing to talk and share in your bad
decisions that night. Surely, we’ve all been angry drunk or sad
drunk, but no one is really looking for those consistently unless
they have a problem. Those are the types that can’t appreciate what
it means to party and instead, in a stark parallel to sobriety,
exhibit the psychological hell of not being in control. As a doctor,
I want an early warning system or an excuse to ask “are you okay?”
Perhaps most importantly for me is the
chance to exhibit the balancing act in my head. I am drawn to the Yin
Yang symbol after all. I love the idea of being someone who can down
a fifth and still handle business. I love the idea of knowing the
perfect cocktail of rum, Steak N Shake, and Pepto Bismal it takes to
get up at 9 and make sure I catch that phone call from the planning
department. I want to tear down the wall between responsible and
irresponsible, at least as far as popular opinion is concerned; be a
responsible rascal.
The style of the party might change,
but the amount of fun doesn’t have to. The child-like enthusiasm is
sacred if only because so many people believe that once it’s lost
you can never get it back. I’ve never had more fun than when I was
creating movie moments with my friends. It’s why I set the stage.
Right now, I think a lot of stages are filled with uncertainty and
bills and instead of trying to think of something new or create a
world that marginalizes “problems,” a lot of people are going to
get swallowed up whole. Maybe you’ll get all sorts of fun and
games out of your families down the line, you saps, but god forbid
you waste your 20-something liver. The world is your Banzai room.
