I keep reading about fat women.
Overwhelmingly, it seems like there is
this push in the media or in the “independent blogger sphere” to
start advocating for this kind of utopia. It's a magical place where
people aren't made fun of. It's where you can be comfortable in your
own skin. It's this loud drum beat of “respect” for people who
are “different” from you. Apparently, being part of the moral
aware elite is a place where we all just carry on like there isn't
this giant insidious part of our natures that isn't an all-inclusive
loving hippie.
I kinda hate everything. It's why I
joke endlessly. If I can't laugh, I'm just going to be angry. I don't
really care what the atrocity is, what the taboo's about, or how you
feel about it. If I was making a joke, hopefully you got it,
hopefully it won't be held over my head for as long as you're capable
of holding a grudge. I think it insanely more wise to “write off”
what I say as insensitive or maybe naive and go about your day,
instead of trying to cut out this place for “the other” as if we
don't conceive of it as the other.
Fat is easy. I have “fat” friends.
Whatever it's supposed to mean. As if bodies don't have different
shapes and sizes and as if I've cataloged everyone and decided upon a
mean unto which I'm to judge them abnormally far away from. You know
what's the least interesting thing about them? HOW FUCKING FAT THEY
ARE! It means nothing to me. We're not trying to outrun a predator.
If they're fat, if they feel bad about it, if they think I have
something to say about it. IT MEANS DICK.
I'm semi-obsessed with the idea that I
don't get “too fat.” This provokes me to play frisbee with people
who will outrun me the rest of my life. This makes me spend half my
food money on green leafy things that websites tell me will help me
live longer. This makes me spend money on a gym membership that I
fairly consistently try to go to. If and when you are doing less than
those things, maybe you just don't give a fuck that you're fat. Maybe
if/when someone is making a joke or “marginalizing your being,”
you kind of asked for it.
Regardless of what you think about the
people experiencing fatness, it's universally understood as not the
ideal health wise. Whether it's the amount of stress on your body is
caused, the kinds of diseases it disposes you to, or the general
perception of the public being “not interested,” it's in the same
vein of “stereotypes exist for a reason.” It's not out and out
because you hate fat people or what they represent that provokes
jokes or a “lesser” stature as far as what society is to
perceive. Even fucking kid cartoons like Wall-E make an example of
how “fat is bad” in the midst of a robot love story!
But I think this speaks to something
bigger. The idea that we shouldn't point out or ridicule or be able
to talk about what's “different.” Yes, different to you. No one
is taking on the whole of humanity's perspective.
I think, if you can do it like a comedian, if you can do it like me, then you should be saying to yourself “who the fuck cares?” I don't actively discriminate or try to make people feel bad because of who they are. Do you think that's going to stop me from making the race, fat, or sexuality joke? Fuck no. I don't think it's more respectful or politically correct to pretend these differences don't exist or don't make you feel a certain way. How you come to the table relating the kind of feelings you have upon engaging with those differences makes all the difference in the world.
To me, it boils down to blaming people for how they actually feel. Instead of digging out what they think about their feelings, or what they can be made to uncover about the roots of those feelings, we take an instance and paint a picture. Like, who gives a fuck if Donald Sterling is racist? Especially if he's racist in his living room! I don't want an old guy who's easily assumed to be racist already have to kiss my ass because of how he thinks about black people. We don't get anywhere in our demonizing of him. We're, in a sense, trying to blame him for “all racism” as if it exists solely within the confines of old white men. It's disrespectful and ignorant of the real “problem.” I'd probably call it more “the nature of the human condition” before I offer it up as something that can be “fixed” or "punished."
My perspective is from the “top” of the food chain. No one is making fat jokes about me. No one is profiling me. I'm not ridiculed and kicked from my house because of who I like sexually. I'm not broke or from a group who's been historically oppressed. But you know what I did have? A bully. I had a totally fucking cunt of a mom who didn't just make fun of or give me shit because of something superficial. I got her every day carrying out her own insecurities on my childlike psyche in ways that continue today in how she influences my brother.
What's my excuse? Why can't I blame her and explain that I'm the victim and I should be able to explain how meaningful and loud I should be about my experiences growing up? I'm a fucking adult! I'm not a fucking bitch! I make decisions and have the capacity to recognize my feelings. You're picked on now? You think you have a better or worse idea of how to escape it or get over it than a child? And even if you manage to find enough gumption to figure your shit out, you think it's ever going away? Might it be wise to approach the problem from a way that respects the idea that there will always be bullies? You'll always be different. It doesn't matter whether you're a fat fuck or gay or whatever.
I think, if you can do it like a comedian, if you can do it like me, then you should be saying to yourself “who the fuck cares?” I don't actively discriminate or try to make people feel bad because of who they are. Do you think that's going to stop me from making the race, fat, or sexuality joke? Fuck no. I don't think it's more respectful or politically correct to pretend these differences don't exist or don't make you feel a certain way. How you come to the table relating the kind of feelings you have upon engaging with those differences makes all the difference in the world.
To me, it boils down to blaming people for how they actually feel. Instead of digging out what they think about their feelings, or what they can be made to uncover about the roots of those feelings, we take an instance and paint a picture. Like, who gives a fuck if Donald Sterling is racist? Especially if he's racist in his living room! I don't want an old guy who's easily assumed to be racist already have to kiss my ass because of how he thinks about black people. We don't get anywhere in our demonizing of him. We're, in a sense, trying to blame him for “all racism” as if it exists solely within the confines of old white men. It's disrespectful and ignorant of the real “problem.” I'd probably call it more “the nature of the human condition” before I offer it up as something that can be “fixed” or "punished."
My perspective is from the “top” of the food chain. No one is making fat jokes about me. No one is profiling me. I'm not ridiculed and kicked from my house because of who I like sexually. I'm not broke or from a group who's been historically oppressed. But you know what I did have? A bully. I had a totally fucking cunt of a mom who didn't just make fun of or give me shit because of something superficial. I got her every day carrying out her own insecurities on my childlike psyche in ways that continue today in how she influences my brother.
What's my excuse? Why can't I blame her and explain that I'm the victim and I should be able to explain how meaningful and loud I should be about my experiences growing up? I'm a fucking adult! I'm not a fucking bitch! I make decisions and have the capacity to recognize my feelings. You're picked on now? You think you have a better or worse idea of how to escape it or get over it than a child? And even if you manage to find enough gumption to figure your shit out, you think it's ever going away? Might it be wise to approach the problem from a way that respects the idea that there will always be bullies? You'll always be different. It doesn't matter whether you're a fat fuck or gay or whatever.
I hate “random” bitching and cries
for help. Imagine we live in a world where most people don't give a
fuck about you. And even the one's that do, can only do it to a
fairly superficial extent. Stop pretending we're all going to one day
hold hands and chant hymns of love. Stop thinking that someone's
going to look out for you in a way that you're not capable of looking
out for yourself. It wasn't so long ago that we had no objective
means by which to judge anything. Do you think the evidence we have
so far speaks in favor of being a sad whiny bitch about yourself or
place in the world? As if we even need the numbers! Get the fuck over
it.
