Friday, December 21, 2007

[49] Who The Hell Knows Where This Was Going

Place: Ted.com
Discussion: The End of The World
You should be: Concerned

I recently learned, thanks to heretical science, that about 20% of people are clinically depressed. This was a just a fun fact on a discussion about the end of the world and the different things that threaten to end human existence. The universe is a scary place. No one is really thinking about being hit by an asteroid, or a solar flare burning our atmosphere, but as Philip K. Dick so elegantly put it "Reality is that which, even when you stop believing still exists." According to Stephen Petranek
here there are a multitude of ways we are not-so-slowly killing ourselves.

I was hung up on the depression fact though. Its my "mystic" or "spiritual" belief that one way or another we are all connected be it because we're from the earth or because the entire universe is the same particles we are. When I was reading stuff from Deepak Chopra he talked a lot about the unconscious energy field, or that space in your mind that "knows" things w/o you truly thinking about them. Well this mental epidemic made me think about animals and how they "know" when shits about to hit the fan before natural disasters. Ya, I'm bout to get all head trippy, just ride it out. At the same time of me having such disdain for humanity as a whole I still can't forsake the urge compelling me to give people the benefit of the doubt. While intelligence appears to be fleeting from conscious people I like to believe that the back of the mind part can't be tampered with. If I'm right then I would supposed that people are becoming more and more depressed because the "collective unconscious intelligence" is really letting the facts of our plight filled universal situation sink in. Picture it as a massive brain where dreams come from and when you can get into a lucid state the entire world is literally at your grasp.

I've talked a lot about fear and laziness in the past, thank you Waking Life. I think the issue gets more complicated that just being afraid. People don't even know what it there is to be afraid of anymore. Even more likely they've realized there are too many things to be afraid of. Evolution has taught them to be afraid, they survived from dodging bullets and suppressing the urges to investigate, at least the ones who've made it thus far. Now when people care more about drunk drivers or getting mugged who the hell honestly believes there is a better chance of dying from an asteroid than in a tornado? I think I've found good reasons why people are lazy when they aren't justifying it because they are afraid. Personally I feel like sitting and thinking or sleeping does more for my mental state than 90% of the bullshit I try to force into my head in class. I think being relaxed and contemplative can lead to amazing insight and clarity even if it need be only for yourself. I think there is a ping-pong effect in our brains. It bounces back and forth between new and exciting to dull and old to scary and threatening to imaginative and wonderful and no one feels like they have any control over the paddles.

I try to face my death everyday. At least once before I fall asleep I'll think about what if some random ass thing happens and takes me out. Someone may be saying "but nick, you say there aren't any "what-ifs" no future or past just now" and yes this is true but this what if dosen't paralyze me with fear like the ones I hear from my friends. It's one of the only ways I can really direct my thoughts and my actions into the best ways of making me happy. Whenever I buy some expensive thing or act "crazy" its because there may never be a moment to show you who I really am again after one car accident, asteroid, or disappearing rain forest. You think that just because you believe something different than me is making me insecure and defensive? In reality I am just frustrated how people can go so frivolously about their lives w/o ever for a second thinking "am i happy? what makes me happy? is this the truth?" I don't like science because it's like anti-god or offers all the best solutions. I like it because its humanitarian, it focuses on things that enrich life, it tries to protect you from yourselves despite scorn and ridicule from misunderstanding. Ladies and gentlemen we are dead and dying, live it up.

Every time I think about getting a nice house or cool thing to play with there's always the people I care about right along with me in the mental picture playground. Half the crap I do with my life is because I'm thinking that somewhere down the line I might be able to add to a fun time around a fire playing my guitar, or I might be able to throw a kickass movie party around a pimp ass tv. I want to make people I like happy, and I like people I know will be able to appreciate the underlying fabric of the moment. You can't teach or preach "the imminent moment." Its something you have to learn and embrace and practice. It's the one thing that can be totally you no matter what faces you've tried on throughout your life. Everyone is telling you, let me repeat, everyone is telling you the rights and wrongs of life.

When do you get your say?