[1126] System Processing

This may be more outlining different things in little blurbs to talk about later.

I think about what would happen if Biden lost on the basis of Israel/Hamas. Typing that sentence alone will get this post banned from /r/self on reddit. You know, the self page where you can only reflect on approved topics if they don't get too "political." Trump, who enabled Israel in dramatic and unprecedented ways, who also happens to be trying to overthrow democracy, is your alternative? And alternative, not to what is actually happening or a deep understanding of the nature of the conflict, but alternative to your new religious fervor in service to your miserable concept of what a victim is. It's almost too dumb for words, but then, so is all religion.

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I got some stuff done today. Not a ton of stuff, but some gross stuff, some stuff that won't properly complete until probably around midnight tonight, and some stuff that's been flirting with paralyzing me in an ADHD stupor. I'm happy about it. This is the 2nd weekend this year I don't have a pre-scheduled show to head to. I noticed the surge of energy I had upon waking up almost immediately dissipated after I ate. Usually I forget to eat before I get in the middle of some yard work or project, so I deliberately tried to fuel up, and it worked against me.

I'm almost through the 4th episode of 601 shows, or that's the closest approximation, with some much further along, and some I just added to my list. I went from feeling stuck and overwhelmed at the prospect of watching the shows I had backlogged to feeling energized to add more and more now that I'm approaching them like TV of old times. There's 20 of those 601 I've put on their own playlist to watch sooner. There's 60 that are currently airing that I'm staying on top of. I've used ChatGPT and Advanced Renamer to give me code to make the titles easier to sort, name, and pull from shortcuts. I've been recording clips that either make me laugh, I think I can send as inside jokes, or I imagine I might use if I had a commentary/clip channel. I also signed back up for Drumeo for a 2nd time due to El Estepario. I should spend a lot of time practicing tonight and recording lessons so I don't have to keep paying.

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I'm deep enough into the woods of CASA to start having stronger opinions. It's filled with Lisa Simpsons. If you're curious why volunteer organizations that require high-level organization and competence can work, it's because the already overworked, brilliant, but deeply insecure people who run 1,000 miles a minute to avoid working at their core issues self-select. I say this having been born and bred in that same vein. The problem, and I can't really overstate this, my job is literally, one-for-one, what an assessor and permanency worker, if they were competent, paid enough, and properly supported, would do.

I'm not learning anything new. I'm not getting any special powers. In fact, I'm learning just how over-burdened your average DCS worker is from a new angle. This program takes what I'm finding to be an unbearable (not really) amount of time to over-explain what your life should look like with one case. One singular family. In a month of one day, three hour, online learning courses together, some modules to barely fill out, and a couple in-person base touches, and you get sworn in to "advocate for the child."

They go head over heels to pretend your job isn't actually to be an assessor or permanency worker. But you are doing literally the exact same things I was doing, just for free, and for one family instead of 12-15 at once every week, or maybe 20-30 on your permanency caseload. There's 725 kids who don't have CASA representatives. The existence of CASA altogether is a judge's response to inadequacies he saw in the system back in the 70s. I advocated for children's best interest my entire career. That apparently comes so not-naturally to so many people that no one is willing to hire and pay anyone enough to do so in a sustainable way, and the only way we can even pick at the correct solution is wait for the MCATS-taking, master's graduates with 3 jobs, and wildly successful retirees to step up.

I think I can do more of my inside stuff now and fire back up the squawk box.