Tuesday, March 24, 2015

[xx-15] Erroneous

I've only ever lived in Indiana.
I used to have a mini cooper (terrible cold weather car)
I've never been in a car accident except with a deer (poor deer, mini handled it like a boss)
I've owned 2 collies and 3 cats
I've traveled to Wisconsin, Michigan, Tennessee, Kentucky, North Carolina, Florida, Louisiana, Colorado, Canada, and accidentally New York when I missed the exit for Montreal
I can play the saxophone and guitar well and the drums and piano less well
I write frequently
I was in student government, FCCLA, spell bowl, and chess club as last minute extra curriculars. Marching band as practically a job, and jazz band for fun.
I've graduated high school and college
I've had 12 jobs I didn't own, in order, usher, (later hourly manager), Target cart boy, high school woodwind teacher, IU Telefund operator, twice a website developer/promoter, cab driver, steak n shake grill guy, cell phone cover seller, real estate agent, liquor store cashier, landscaping/yard worker
I've never been fired
I've had 2 jobs I did/do own. Coffee shop owner, now coffee van delivery owner (currently in stasis)
I've done ~20 medical drug trials
I've seen at least 1,379 movies, not including documentaries, lectures, and debates
I've read or listened to ~200 books
I've seen every episode of over 300 television shows
I mostly stopped playing video games around 15, but play Little Big Planet and Smash 1 & 2 occasionally with friends
I've had both my tonsils and wisdom teeth removed
I've only ever broken my nose
I've played soccer, basketball, baseball, and dodge ball on a team, ultimate frisbee semi-competitively when it's warm
I've had sex with 30 women, and fooled around with 70 or so.
I've been a member of a gym, library, Kroger, and the Federal Body Inspectors club
I've got 2 best friends and a dad that I'm beholden to more than myself, might throw my brother in there if shit got too real
I've got about 15 people who are legit as fuck that I'd look out for more than the average Joe
I've had a restraining order filed against me by my mom that just expired this last Thanksgiving!
I've been pulled over ~35 times and only been given 1 speeding ticket (10 years ago) and one for not having my registration
I'm dramatically below the poverty line and you'd never guess it based on the sheer amount of nice shit I have
I used to be a thief (from big box stores), this is unrelated to the above point
I wear a yin-yang necklace everyday, not because I know really anything about Taoism, but because the idea of balance strikes me as right and proper
I've been to Ozzfest (when System headlined), Warped Tour a few times, a Beach Boys concert, Linkin Park and Incubus, Victor Wooten, Sara Watkins, Jimmy Eat World, Sum 41, Senses Fail, Shiny Toy Guns, Sleigh Bells, All Time Low in a dinky coffee shop in NW Indiana first before I knew of them, and then front and center for a Warped performance a few years later
I've been to So You Think You Can Dance's road show, seen the Madison Scouts, The Chicago Symphony Orchestra, the ballet something in Chicago, all the museums and the Shed Aquarium, the Taste of Chicago, the zoos, and Navy Pier
I've been to Cedar Point, Six Flags, and Universal Studios, Deep River and ridden every roller coaster and water slide
I've seen American Idiot's crappy road crew Broadway performance, and listened to Richard Dawkins give a talk at IU auditorium
I've seen Neal Brennan, Al Jackson, Marc Maron, Guy Branum, and Ron Funches live.
I've been to 9 Cubs games, and 1 White Sox game
I've tried cigarettes, shrooms, acid, cocaine, weed (likely allergic), molly, ecstasy, but currently just drink and not often enough :(
I used to have a stripper pole in my kitchen and a silky room with black lights and a ton of pillows dedicated to hookah
I survived drinking 31 shots in one night.
I have long curly hair, an eyebrow piercing, and a back tattoo.
I own 3 vehicles including a moving truck, coffee van, and neon, and 5 acres of land.
I've climbed to the top of a couple mountains, and been driven over the side of one.
My bills are $400 a month, including utilities, gas, and food
I'm 26, 6'2 and 205 pounds, healthy, but could stand to get healthcare
I view my aspirations towards greatness as intrinsically frivolous.